There you are. Listening to the rain, oh how delicious.

Sleep was a long time coming last night, too many noises inside the head. 

But now you are here, standing by the open window, watching the rain come down hard outside, smoothing lotion into your hands and arms. 

So many images are racing through your mind like a tape on fast forward: a newborn baby on your belly, a barefoot run for ice cream on a hot wet street after a summer's storm, the blue roofs of Jodhpur, M smiling at you from her hospital bed hello sweetie, give us just a minute, R's hand on your neck, the smooth stones of the reef hotel lobby under your knees as you are tying the pink ribbons of S's straw hat, the Poolbeg lighthouse across the sandy beach at low tide, kids rolling in a pile of autumn leaves, your father washing the dishes on a Sunday, the steam from the cup of mulled wine at a Xmas market somewhere, Vienna?, your piano teacher eating peanuts, toes sinking into the coral sand in paradise. 

You close your eyes and concentrate on the apricot light.

It is all there. And so are you.