05 November 2014

November. Not my time of the year, I could say.
It is ridiculous, really. Because I give into a mood, it's quite the thing to do. 
Oh oh November, I always get depressed in November, people tell me. Before I know it, I wake up and I think, November, am I depressed? And well, let's blame it all on this damp month with bare trees and wind and the dark evenings.

The little cat is dead, we went to the vet and he did the thing. It was dark and raining hard by the time we got home and while R dug the hole in the back of the garden, I washed the floors and got rid of the litter box and all the rest. 

Then the basement started to smell. We actually had a fight over who was going to check behind the stacked flower pots for maybe a dead mouse or worse and yes, it was pouring by then. Whatever it was, it just disappeared. I think.

Quite appropriately, R started to investigate his pension situation in what, three-four years and oh my goodness, we are going to be skint. Absolutely. And that is before tax. So now, we snarl at each other and I cannot sleep and really, I feel like a right fool. Because we always knew and we more than once managed with even less when we were young and wild (and healthy). We can always sell the house, R shrugs. But we both know how that will hurt. Or maybe not. Go to sleep, he tells me, no use thinking about it now.

A quite popular writer and poet here used to have this daily newspaper column, on the last page of one of the more radical national papers, where he would write a little ditty about current affairs, corrupt politicians or anything else that he wanted to get off his chest. So he wrote this little poem about November, how miserable and grey it is and what a waste of time and let's get rid of it and so on. 
Next day, the paper published a letter from a seven year old boy, complaining about giving November a bad name. And he listed all the great things November has to offer: leaves to mess about, raincoats and mittens and scarves to wear, puddles to jump into, hot cocoa to drink when you get home and so on. 
And of course, your man had to rewrite his poem and he did. And I have it all somewhere, the first poem, the letter and the second poem. I cut it all out and had a good laugh. Because, here's the thing: midwinter is only seven weeks away. Time flies. Before we know it we'll be old and poor.


  1. Was just thinking about your little cat. So much like my Oboe. Our little cats are dear to us.

    Except that we look out on salt water and islands here, it looks very much like your river scene with the bare trees, low light, and the heavy sky.

    Although I don't mind the weather, November is a hard month. Even thought it is darker in November, there seems to be more light once the first days of December come.

    Your financial position is just like mine. I often forget that I am old, but I don't forget that I am financially vulnerable.

    I keep thinking about Illness, by Havi Carel, and the words in the dedication:

    Gracias a la vida que me ha dado tanto.

  2. Thank you for your kind comment - as always.

    On bad days I sometimes think that everything and all would be a million times better if only I lived by the sea. Which of course is just a futile thought.

  3. So very sorry to hear about your little cat. I still miss my old cat-friend I lost a few years ago. They're family, aren't they.

    I'd gladly exchange our never-ending California drought-sun and heat--it was 80 degrees here again yesterday!--for your rainy German November weather. I think the lact of seasonal change has affected my mood, just as it has yours. Except ... mirrored, somehow. As I recall, November in Germany can be bright and crystal cold, too, and beautiful. I loved the season there, and always started looking forward to gluwein and Kristkindlmarkt about now.

    I hope you're feeling better, and that worry for the future won't cause more trouble.

    And you shot such a lovely, evocative photo for this post, Sabine! I hope you don't mind: I copied it for my desktop to remind me of how November is really supposed to be. ;)

  4. Hi Sabine. It is so sad to lose your furry friend. Leaves a big hole in your heart. I hope you survive your November blues and step into a beautiful spring in the near future. Every season has its beauty. Even winter. Not that I know much about it. I'm in Australia and our November is HOT! And our winter is mild.

    Denise :)

  5. O yes, November doldrums. I know exactly.

    Skint-what a perfect word. And me too. And ridiculous to be in the midst of a remodel which I think..I can afford, as long as I work til I die.

    But savings, what a laugh. I hope to build a MIL or an air B&B in the basement and have some extra income coming in.

    The wee cat, so sorry. I'd love to get rid of the litter box but the critters are so sweet. Mostly.