16 July 2015

gone east

Stolberg, Harz mountains

Day three of travelling with my 86-year old father. Already, I have greatly disappointed him. It all started out quite well despite the fact that we arrived late (43 min!). As I got out of the car I could hear him clapping his hands all the way from his observation post in the deep armchair of the hotel lobby and before I had climbed the stairs, I could see the glee in his eyes. We continued from there. I tried to remain patient and all but some time after dinner last night I almost lost it. There are times when life seems too short to debate the finer details of classical Greek lyrics. Debate is not exactly the correct term either. I could see myself shrinking back into my angry teenage self, the one I thought I had left behind forever about 40 years ago. Silly of me, I know.
That and feeling unwell. I blame the heat for the time being and have spent the day in this very comfortable hotel room bed dozing and occasionally exchanging messages with R who is following him around and on top of mountains and steam trains and much more I am happily missing out of.

Still. This could be his last summer. It doesn't feel like it, his energy is overpowering despite the fact that he hardly eats or drinks and the condescension in his voice is as sharp as ever.

always running behind him


Ms. Moon said...

Sometimes I mourn the fact that I never really had a father. Other times, I'm not terribly upset about it. I hope that won't be taken the wrong way!

am said...

That's uncanny. If I didn't know that was your dad, I'd say that was my dad at 86 years old. My dad lived until he was 89 years old. Although our relationship was difficult, our last visit (a month before he died) was mostly peaceful.

I became ill trying to be supportive of him for the 6 years he lived in Bellingham after our mother died. At the time of his death he had been living in Seattle for about a year and a half, near his only grandson and my sister and her husband.

Good to know you have been able to rest in bed today.

Rouchswalwe said...

Please get some some rest, dear Sabine. And try not to let the sharpness cut you. I certainly know from my father how that can cause unwellness.

Steve Reed said...

Oh, Lord. Debating classical Greek can't be fun when combined with paternal authority! I think it's great you've taken a breather back at the hotel. (Nice photos, BTW!)