With February ending I note with wonder that I had only five sick days and these at the beginning of the month right after the RTX treatments. But shhh, keeping fingers crossed.

My gums are shot to pieces, the inside of my nostrils a bloody battlefield, but what do I care. I cycled for an hour yesterday afternoon, icy wind from all sides, clear skies reflected in the swampy puddles of the forest and the birds heckling from their hiding places high up.

My inner balance is all over the place. There are so many good things to look forward to, visitors, travel, decisions, and I have stopped getting emotional about the teeny tiny damp spot in the basement. Instead, I cried over Leo's oscar speech, while R spent his weekend plastering and painting the walls of a former hospital together with Syrian refugees who are living there now, four to a room. Very polite people, gentle to a fault, he tells me.