It is 4:25 am and raining heavily. Sleep does not seem an option right now as my old pal gastritis has decided to come for a visit. I spent the last hour (s?) reading and clicking my way through the mad and sad world on this screen, falling deeper and faster into a tunnel of shouting colours and disasters until I found myself reading a recipe selection for summer puddings.
For the briefest moment I considered my sanity or possibly the loss of it but then I remembered that R made raspberry jam today - and not for the first time - and how happy I was watching him there in our messy kitchen.
For the briefest moment I considered my sanity or possibly the loss of it but then I remembered that R made raspberry jam today - and not for the first time - and how happy I was watching him there in our messy kitchen.
And right now the dawn chorus has started to compete with the rain. This is just another day for me, for you, for us. Another day when we will fail to grasp what it means to be alive. So unbelievably alive.
Yesterday I was angry about Orlando, and my anger sustained me. This morning I am deeply sad. Perhaps browsing cookbooks and planning my next meal is just what the doctor ordered? Sometimes just living a normal life is a revolutionary act.
ReplyDeleteI tried to remember all the mass shootings that have occurred in my lifetime. I found a list and saw that there were bloody carnage that I had already forgotten, covered by the dust of other bones. When I was 14, in 1966 a shooter killed 14 people. It was the day I learned the word sniper. Now I am learning that the world will never be what I want it to be. Never. Today is another day after another massacre.
ReplyDeleteYesterday afternoon I was with friends at a local choral concert. The director of the Whatcom Chorale determined that the concert would be dedicated to all affected by the most recent shootings, and a moment of silence was requested before the performance. All during the concert, I thought about musicians continuing play music, singers continuing to sing, no matter what happens, drawing on the healing power of music.
ReplyDeleteIn this time of sorrow for so many innocent people, I continue to hear these words:
I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. This is why right, temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Acts like this make us all doubt our sanity, because they are so insane. It's as if the world gets knocked off balance and takes a while to right itself.
ReplyDeleteThe immediacy of life going on is what kills me.
ReplyDelete