26 April 2018

There it is, spring. Currently, we are enjoying lilac week. A flowering lilac in every garden here. It's a German thing. Which is why R doesn't like it and has been sabotaging - by constant replanting - the gnarled old one we inherited when we bought the house back when we were younger. The man who gardens here has a strict hierarchy and on top are plants that produce food not feasts.

This is today's view for those who arrive via the back lane on bicycle. I left my bicycle there for show.
My energy levels are shitty and I try not to think of the woman I used to be, the one who cycled daily come rain or shine. Right now, I mainly concentrate on making it through half a day at work and the tiniest, shortest cycle if I'm lucky.

My brain is equally shitty, tired and certain thoughts are going round and round where I wish they would not. I am now on five different meds throughout the day. According to the experts, this has become necessary in order to reduce too many risks and therefore will keep me alive. 
Seriously. All these new versions of being alive, I am learning. Must polish my appreciation skills and all that stuff about acceptance. Taking things for granted is overrated.

So, what else happens.
Steve's post on the collecting impulse brought back memories of stuffing the bib pocket of my overalls, getting water into my wellies trying to catch tadpoles, trapping maybugs, peeling flattened lizards off the road. And then I found this image online:

In which we see what writer Katie Munnik found in her 4-yr old's winter coat before washing. Essentials, basically. 

And BTW wasn't that congress speech by Macron refreshing. 
Whereas on a much more somber note, this did not lift my spirits but read I had to:
Without hope, goes the truism, we will give up. And yet optimism about the future is wishful thinking, says Hillman. He believes that accepting that our civilisation is doomed could make humanity rather like an individual who recognises he is terminally ill. Such people rarely go on a disastrous binge; instead, they do all they can to prolong their lives.
Can civilisation prolong its life until the end of this century? “It depends on what we are prepared to do.” He fears it will be a long time before we take proportionate action to stop climatic calamity. “Standing in the way is capitalism. Can you imagine the global airline industry being dismantled when hundreds of new runways are being built right now all over the world? It’s almost as if we’re deliberately attempting to defy nature. We’re doing the reverse of what we should be doing, with everybody’s silent acquiescence, and nobody’s batting an eyelid.”

Mayer Hillman (here)



. . .


  1. I think Macron played Trump like a fiddle and it was beautiful.
    As an American, I feel as if I must apologize over and over for that man. Not Macron. I'm sorry. He is not my president.

  2. Macron gives us all hope. And don’t we need it - especially in the UK when those in power seem to sink to new lows every week.
    Hang in there. And why should you be grateful for small mercies. A little rage at life now and then is fine!

  3. We fight to live, we fight for justice and against those who would destroy the earth in their greedy ignorance. We honor the heroes who stand up to powerful bullies. We honor those who are determined to live with honor. We make accommodations for our limitations, but not for injustice or greed. I learn so much from reading your blog.

    The back lane is gorgeous. I'm always happy to see your bike.

  4. There is so much going on here at your blog and everywhere. I had to stop yesterday to gather my thoughts before writing today. It's getting harder and harder to write. That's a good thing. No easy answers.

    Jaron Lanier lightly suggests that we all delete our Facebook and Google accounts (including Blogger) as a step in helping him fix the Internet so that it doesn't enable a third party, for profit (through advertisements), to negatively manipulate communication between people. He got a good laugh for saying that in his TED talk.

    I thought about what he said. I deleted my Facebook account in December, but I can't afford to pay for a Wordpress blog. If I had to pay for Blogger, I would stop blogging and keep in touch with blog friends by mail if that became necessary.

    Jaron said that things we pay for (with money) tend to be better than things we don't pay for (with money). My experience is that the BEST things in life are free, as well as free of advertising, although I'm willing to pay for postage (-:

    What I heard Jaron saying was, "So sorry that we computer geniuses have made such a mess of things. We'll get it right next time. Don't you worry your little heads about this. You can trust us. Trust me! I've got this figured out. Believe in me."

    Given the choice between Mayer and Jaron, I'll go with Mayer and keep my mind open to other voices like his.

    I appreciate your back lane and your bike and the lilacs. I appreciate the collection of the 4 year old. I appreciate what you write and what you share as you live with chronic illness and something else that resists letting chronic illness define your life. Sending love.

  5. I agree with Ms Moon. yesterday Trump went so far off the deep end in a phone interview with his favorite people on his favorite show on his favorite 'news' station that they all had deer in the headlights looks and then basically hung up on him. they hung up on the president of the United States! I loved Macron playing Trump with the whole bromance thing and then skewering him in his speech.

    on a nicer topic, your back entrance is lovely and so nice that spring has made its way to you.

    and re the human race...we have gone insane and so guarantee our demise sooner rather than later. I've always thought we will be one of the planet's least successful life forms in terms on how long we exist on the planet.

  6. I read the Hillman article this morning, nodding my head and wondering how it will unfold, knowing I won't be here when the worst of it begins to happen. There is no will to make any changes, and it really may already be too late. The moneyed interests will always win. They have bought power and for some reason can never have enough... ever.

  7. I too love how Macron played the bromance thing and then gave that wonderful speech. Trump might have been infatuated enough by then to have listened a bit. Pity none of it will stick. Nothing sticks with that man, he is like a sinister narcissistic weather vane. I have lately been despairing of social media, and its toxicity, and our general vulnerability to being hacked and subject to all manner of fake news. i don't have any answers, no have i heard any from better minds than mine. We stumble along. And you, dear Sabine, I hope you feel much better, soon.

  8. I love the collecting picture! I guess it's human nature to collect, isn't it? And it's so interesting that that little girl clearly has an eye for a certain size and shape of stick. She is remarkably consistent. 37P is right about Macron -- it was a wonderful speech but I don't think it will take hold with Our Man Trump. I'll take a look at that Hillman article.

  9. Lilacs are my favorite flower and way out here on the southern left coast of the US we only see them sold in small bunches at Whole Foods. I did yesterday, as a matter of fact, and I buried my nose in them. I was loathe to spend $20 and left without them, but I think today I might go back and splurge.