28 June 2018

Our union is like this:
You feel cold so I reach for a blanket to cover
our shivering feet.
A hunger comes into your body
so I run to my garden and start digging potatoes.
You asked for a few words of comfort and guidance and
I quickly kneel by your side offering you
a whole book as a
gift.
You ache with loneliness one night so much
you weep, and I say
here is a rope, tie it around me,
I will be your
companion
for life.
Hafiz

Today is our 36th wedding anniversary. Not that we make a big deal about it, never have. We got married so I could stay in Ireland and we had to travel to England for it because I am not catholic and in those days, it was extremely much too difficult to marry outside of the church. Life was complicated back then but we laughed our way through it. This is the link to that day, I post it every year and by now the whole world has read it. It still makes us happy to remember.

Today was hot, R went to the dentist for a check-up, I ate too many apricots and did some laundry. After lunch indoors (because 33°C /91°F) I went to work and did some important things to keep the world turning while R waited for the window cleaners and mowed a neighbour's lawn. For dinner, he grilled Irish salmon wrapped in slices of freshly harvested zucchini and roast some of our first potatoes with fat splotches of salty butter. All through dinner on the patio, we watched the butterflies and bumble bees frolicking on the phlox and buddleia and agapanthus. For dessert we crawled on all fours through the strawberry bed. I made some tea and sat on the patio to read a couple of sad short stories by Carys Davies because I have to return the book tomorrow and R harvested the onions.





I should add that we argue a lot these days, plenty of hissing and misunderstandings. You know, the stuff that comes up every so often.

Also, this music:




8 comments:

  1. Happy anniversary you two lovebirds! As my mother and her sisters used to say, “where there are no differences, there is indifference.” Wishing you many more years of posting your beautiful story.

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  2. I adore a good love story. Not the perfect ones. The messy ones, the ones with character and skinned knees. Thank you for sharing as the whole rest the world may have read it but this was my first time.

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  3. we'll have our 42nd come August. we've given up all the battles (mostly), they'll never be won. doesn't mean we don't get irritated at one another at times. for me, at least, my level of romantic attachment has waned but it's comfortable enough.

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  4. Happy Anniversary! Lovely story, beautifully told. And your today garden? Gorgeous!

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  5. The ongoing story of you and your prince on the white horse never fails to move me. And this year with Hafiz, your splendid garden, grilled Irish salmon, and Nina Simone singing. Kind wishes to you and R on your 36th wedding anniversary!

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  6. We're closing in on the 58th but who's counting? To count you put one figure after another and eventually reluctance fructifies; somewhere, not too far ahead, is the last figure in this sequence. Then what? We laugh now, not then. We'd chosen to live in one of the world's most expensive cities and were paying the price. A bottle of Tizer (knowing you, you won't need to Google) on Sunday evening; last night it was a 2012 Pauillac. Conspicuous consumption? Without doubt. Poverty offered less to laugh at.

    Getting older brings problems - I know you know that. I can't be sure but getting older may also bring detachment. Clear-sightedness isn't necessarily a comfort but I see it as an adult state. Being an adult is, I hope, an asset to be set against ageing.

    And yes there are arguments. Nasty and violent, over within seconds. But get this - over by prior agreement! Now that's an asset. As is music, during which we may become someone else, less given to carping, more aware of life's possibilities, a brief period of secular self-canonisation. Have a good one, whatever that means to you.

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  7. That poem takes my breath away. Perfect for your anniversary. Ah, marriage. You describe it so well. Happy 36th to you and your love.

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  8. Yes to many more years posting your beautiful story!

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